Last night MrS did my ironing. No one has done my ironing for me since I was 16.
I didn’t ask him to. He had some to do and was doing it while I FaceTimed the boys. When I’d finished I turned round and found a pile of my completed ironing. It actually made me cry. Other men I have known wouldn’t even do their own ironing let alone mine too.
Some might think our relationship is perhaps a “rule breaker” – too fast, too soon, even by today’s hurried standards. Even friends who are happy for us, those who are “on our side” doubtless think that. (“You met HOW?” “You’re doing WHAT?”) We first met in real life just six weeks after my ex and I decided to split. We didn’t plan it; as I’ve said in this blog previously we had chatted on Twitter for a few months and when he saw me struggling
one day he tweeted about taking me out in London. That was 3 December last year.
However, we have taken the view that if we don’t know what we want at our time of life we never will. And what we wanted was to be together and give it a proper shot. You can’t plan when or how you meet the right person. You can meet the right person at the wrong time or the wrong person at the right time. I believe those wrong people are sent to show us what it is we really need. If MrS and I had met when I was previously single I’m not sure we would have even thought a relationship was possible, too many obstacles.
At 54 and 44 we both have baggage, naturally. But our mantra from the start has been “This time we won’t fuck it up”. With any luck we will have learned enough from our past mistakes. That big lesson is to keep talking. Not say everything is “fine” when it isn’t. Since we met my life has changed so much as to be unrecognisable from what it was a year ago in a million good ways of course. Things have been fabulous since I moved down here, but they haven’t been all “fine” I’m still dealing with the difficulties of trying to buy and move into a flat in Norwich, I miss the boys a lot, I’m tired from living “London Hours” and whilst I love my job I feel like my head is overflowing with STUFF all the time.
These things will pass and evolve as things usually do.
at the end of the day, when we sit down together, when we talk and LISTEN to each other and we work things out, we know that it’s all worth it because above all else we are in this forever.
We’re not going to fuck it up this time.
And I think he’s made a pretty great start with the ironing ;)